Drunk as Druck in Waikiki Beach

As I may have mentioned, I was in Waikiki Beach last week. Wikiwiki is Hawaiian for quick. Waikiki, however, is Hawaiian for “Hello, sailor!” If you’re female, and in need of an ego boost gleaned from a parade of young Navy dudes, Air Force pilots and Marine aviators, all vying for your attention, get yourself there wikiwiki.

Frangipani? Plumeria? White jasmine? A lei by any other name is still a damn good time.

I was staying at the Outrigger Reef on the Beach, and they clearly have a contract with the US military. You couldn’t throw a coconut without hitting someone wearing a camouflage jumpsuit and sporting a nickname patch over the left breast like “Warthog,” “Chaos” or “FITS.” (Those are all real. I did the legwork. Buh dum BUH.)

Funny, I don't remember that waterfall. But I did drink a LOT of vodka.

Hotel itself is fine. Liked the Starbucks in the lobby. Would’ve liked it better if my keycard stayed magnetized for more than an hour. Surprisingly tasty food at the Kana Ka Pila Grille though, which even in nicer hotels is often an afterthought. Fresh ahi tacos, adorned with a crown of fragrant cilantro! Kalua pork quesadillas! Live music! Yay. Another hotel restaurant, the Shore Bird, is right on the water:

You have to cook your own steak here. Why go to a restaurant at all?

I took the Outrigger Catamaran for a combo snorkel and sail — and it was awesome. I loved it! The crew was friendly, laid-back and chill. No flippers, just snorkels. No life jackets except in an emergency situation. Mai tais, $3. We checked out a few of these guys:

Look who's coming out of his shell.

Favorite part? The 82ā€¢ ocean water. LA’s coastal waters hover at just above freezing (only a slight exaggeration) and are filthy dirty, so warm, clean sea water is a refreshing change. I could’ve stayed there, letting the undulating waves gently lift and lower me, all day long.

That catamaran on the left is mine. ALL MINE.

More Hawaii tomorrow. Mahalo!



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8 responses to “Drunk as Druck in Waikiki Beach

  1. John P

    Hawaii may very well be one of the best places on mother earth. Glad you enjoyed it!

  2. Ugh. I’m so jealous. Trip to Maui this year got cancelled — so bummed. Aloha.

  3. What, no pictures of grass skirts?

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