Druck the Bunnies that Be

Hooray for Friday. This morning in the shower, I composed a song for my lover. Would you like to hear it? Sung to the old Simon & Garfunkel chestnut, The Sound of Silence:

Hello vodka, my old friend.
I’ve come to need you once again.
Because the dudes I date are creepy,
And you make me good and sleepy,
And the visions that you plant within my brain,
Numb the pain.

Vodka and I were due for a tearful reunion, and last night’s outing at Copa D’Oro with awesome pal Alison was everything I expected and so much more. Faithful readers will remember Mother Drucker’s vast appreciation for fresh grapefruit juice, and Copa’s sexy, bicep-baring bartender squeezes those little suckers right in front of you. Bless him.

If it makes you cry, is it a boo berry?

I had a greyhound, of course, and Allison had a pretty champagne cocktail with a bitters-kissed sugar cube at the bottom, creating a geyser of Happy Bubbles. (My name in prison. Humor me, it’s been awhile.) Copa D’Oro is dark and slightly noisy, but there are lots of nooks and crannies for intimate conversation, or other intimate activities. (Flossing.) Sometimes they have live music, and it gets crazy up in there on the weekends.

Bow wow wow yippy yo yippy yay.

In other news, it’s almost EASTER! I was WAAAY sadder to find out that a mutant, globe-trotting bunny wasn’t real than I was about Santa. Not sure what that says about me, but maybe it’s because Easter is centered around chocolate which, at six, was my raison d’etre, and my sister was allergic so it was the only time of year when I really got to cram in the cacao. (Resisting the urge to make another prison joke…. And it’s gone.) So for your Easter giggling pleasure:

Caption reads, "This one is raping a dog."

So wrong. And here are some more sketchy bunnies — maybe not quite as disturbing as Santas Be Sketchy, but disturbingly close. Take a peek, then put on your Easter bonnet and hop away from your computer. Hoppy Easter, everybunny!

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