My Druckin Barbie Bed

You may not know this about me. But I sleep on a Barbie bed. It’s also been called a prison cot. (WARNING: the following picture is technically NSFW, even though the dolls are clearly asexual.)

I love that 'Asian' Barbie is the one capturing this precious moment on film.

WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH PEOPLE?! But I digress.

Ever since I moved to LA in 2005, I’ve slept on a tiny hotel cot with a bar in my back. It’s because I keep telling myself that my stay here is temporary. That investing in a twin bed is silly. And that some day I’ll have an apartment bigger than the interior of my old VW Cabrio, Gwynnie. (RIP.)

Five years later, it’s time to invest in a big-girl bed. A SERIOUS bed. A bed that can take it when the walls start shakin’ and the earth starts quakin’. A bed big enough for more than 1.5 adults:

The Kiwis call it a fart sack. I call it heaven.

Does anyone know where I can procure such a treasure at a reasonable price? (Read: serious discount.) And don’t say E-bay, smarty-pants. I already thought of that.

I’m open to suggestions for other luxury beds, like the Westin Heavenly Bed or the sexy silver bed inside the Arctic Ice Palace where Lois and Superman finally sealed the deal in Superman II.

The good news is, my Barbie bed does not encourage sharing. So if that’s you waiting in my closet with your camera, Asian Barbie, you’ll want to bring a stack of US magazines and some snacks. It’s gonna be awhile.

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2 Comments

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2 responses to “My Druckin Barbie Bed

  1. Alex

    ahhh….too funny. My childhood friend and I played Barbie for hours on end. I always wanted to play the character of Mom & Dad…I knew even then (10) that this was where the action was…my Barbies had the same bed but everything happened with Ken and they would ALWAYS do it under the covers.

    As for heavenly beds…might I suggest Ikea for some down delights at reasonable prices?

    • debra

      ha!! so funny, i always told my poor sister what her barbie was supposed to say — guess i was writing the scripts from a young age! 🙂

      i am gonna head for ikea online right now… coming soon to a blog near you

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